...i call my fear Frank and feed him gummy colas so that eventually a sugar buzz makes him nap...he mumbles while he sleeps until I tightly tuck a blanket up to his chin...i look away as he snores and when I look back the blanket sits folded at the end of my sunk secondhand costco couch...
Oh, so many times I've shared those fears and insecurities with you. So glad you wrote this, now I can *not* bother you privately and just come back to read this.
[Haha just kidding, I'll still text you ;)]
Seriously, so glad you wrote this reminder everyone on a creative journey needs. It's both an encouraging read, and also an articulation of an answer to a question I had trouble with: Why publish? I can clearly articulate the value of writing, or creating, but not of putting it out. Now I do with such beautiful and poignant prose, I will let fear follow. Thank you for another way in which you have encouraged me.
Also glad you getting more and more recognition as time goes by, it's so well deserved, such a semi-hidden gem you are!
Fear? Insecurity? Can’t relate! But seriously, you know I can and this piece resonated with me so hard. I loved it, I saw myself in it. And as long as it brings you joy, I hope you do keep writing because I always enjoy reading the words you paint together.
Also this, what a mantra:
“By publishing, I choose to feel the fear, not feed it. It’s surrender; but instead of defeat, or feeling weak, I’m empowered. It’s always a victory. And through that, I grow stronger. I love that I can bounce between fear and courage through publishing online.”
“it’s in sharing my words, that I create a space so vast, I expand.” Thank you for sharing this today. I love this thought particularly. Writing personal essays and publishing them online was a huge step for me when I began a year ago. I too “choose to feel the fear, not feed it.”
That’s what I’m thinking! I’ve always wondered if the little voice that speaks so loudly in my head, trying to stop me, will ever go away, but I think it only gets quieter. Maybe never silent. But courage gets louder to offset it, I think. 🙂 Happy you’ve stuck to writing despite it!
This piece is so essential for new writers, and all writers. WoP should put it on its build week reading list.
I’m inspired by how you acknowledge the fear, see it for what it is, and publish through it because the love of what you’re writing is more important than the fear. That takes not only a lot of courage, but so! much! strength!
“A year from now, how will I feel about myself if I let fear stop me?” Oooofff this is it. I gotta get this made into a big sign and hang it over my desk. And I’m glad you didn’t let fear stop you because your writing brings me so much joy and I would be very sad if it ever went away (out of fear, but if it’s ever out of choice I’ll be a lil sad but someday maybe be ok with it, but plz don’t stop writing)!!!
Also, thank you for featuring my essay this week and the kindest words! I am forever honored and grateful to be a part of Sunday Candy :):):)<3
Agree, for new writers! I will be sharing this in my peer groups this week, it speaks directly to many of their challenges that come up in the first weeks of the cohort. Thank you for sharing this, Sandra.
Yes. Yes. Yes!!! Speak it Sandra!! I/We need to hear this declaration over and over as a reminder to stay vigilant against the invisible tyranny of fears that tempt us into silence outside of our awareness. If we're not taking small steps toward our fears we're simply not living. And I agree. Fear is a sign that we're on track and have something worthwhile to say instead of the opposite. This is a large part of why I'm promoting the practice of speaking, and especially personal storytelling, because we run up against the same need to dance with our fears to find the treasure of our expression.
...i call my fear Frank and feed him gummy colas so that eventually a sugar buzz makes him nap...he mumbles while he sleeps until I tightly tuck a blanket up to his chin...i look away as he snores and when I look back the blanket sits folded at the end of my sunk secondhand costco couch...
The idea of Frank on a secondhand Costco couch is really doing something magical for me.
I like this, though. I think I should name my fear. Maybe I will name it Foote.
Oh, so many times I've shared those fears and insecurities with you. So glad you wrote this, now I can *not* bother you privately and just come back to read this.
[Haha just kidding, I'll still text you ;)]
Seriously, so glad you wrote this reminder everyone on a creative journey needs. It's both an encouraging read, and also an articulation of an answer to a question I had trouble with: Why publish? I can clearly articulate the value of writing, or creating, but not of putting it out. Now I do with such beautiful and poignant prose, I will let fear follow. Thank you for another way in which you have encouraged me.
Also glad you getting more and more recognition as time goes by, it's so well deserved, such a semi-hidden gem you are!
Please, bother me forever! You must.
I'll clearly still need to bother you for the foreseeable future.
We will both let fear follow!
I don't know about recognition, my friend. I'm still very much hidden lol
Let us both keep on bothering each other :)
I think I just did😅
Well, keeping our promise 👌😂
"By publishing, I choose to feel the fear, not feed it. It’s surrender"--thank you for naming the feelings I felt but didn't understand. I love this.
Dearest Alissa, thank you for reading<3
I read this back twice because you so perfectly encapsulated the process of writing + writing in public.
I’ve never thought about it in such a way as you explained it.
I enjoyed how you talked about surrender too. What if we surrendered, instead of resisting “that thing”?
Thank you for your amazing perspective, Sandra!
Aww, thanks Anthony! :)
that means a lot.
I appreciate you taking the time to read.
Fear? Insecurity? Can’t relate! But seriously, you know I can and this piece resonated with me so hard. I loved it, I saw myself in it. And as long as it brings you joy, I hope you do keep writing because I always enjoy reading the words you paint together.
Also this, what a mantra:
“By publishing, I choose to feel the fear, not feed it. It’s surrender; but instead of defeat, or feeling weak, I’m empowered. It’s always a victory. And through that, I grow stronger. I love that I can bounce between fear and courage through publishing online.”
"And as long as it brings you joy, I hope you do keep writing because I always enjoy reading the words you paint together."
That goes right back at you :)
“Each time I write and publish, I wonder if it will be my last.” - you’re in my head.
Nooooooooooooo Randy!!
An instant classic for writers to revisit and reread. Two of my favorite lines:
"By publishing, I choose to feel the fear, not feed it."
"Because love is my lantern and fear is my shadow. I can’t have one without the other, and maybe I wouldn’t want to. "
I probably need to reread it more than anyone🙈
Thank you!💙
“it’s in sharing my words, that I create a space so vast, I expand.” Thank you for sharing this today. I love this thought particularly. Writing personal essays and publishing them online was a huge step for me when I began a year ago. I too “choose to feel the fear, not feed it.”
Tracy, I so appreciate you sharing this! It's a hard step, but a worthy step.
Do you feel the fear has lessened for you?
Thank YOU for reading and sharing :)
Yes, the fear has lessened over time-I’m not sure it will ever disappear. But I’m okay with that:)
That’s what I’m thinking! I’ve always wondered if the little voice that speaks so loudly in my head, trying to stop me, will ever go away, but I think it only gets quieter. Maybe never silent. But courage gets louder to offset it, I think. 🙂 Happy you’ve stuck to writing despite it!
This piece is so essential for new writers, and all writers. WoP should put it on its build week reading list.
I’m inspired by how you acknowledge the fear, see it for what it is, and publish through it because the love of what you’re writing is more important than the fear. That takes not only a lot of courage, but so! much! strength!
“A year from now, how will I feel about myself if I let fear stop me?” Oooofff this is it. I gotta get this made into a big sign and hang it over my desk. And I’m glad you didn’t let fear stop you because your writing brings me so much joy and I would be very sad if it ever went away (out of fear, but if it’s ever out of choice I’ll be a lil sad but someday maybe be ok with it, but plz don’t stop writing)!!!
Also, thank you for featuring my essay this week and the kindest words! I am forever honored and grateful to be a part of Sunday Candy :):):)<3
Agree, for new writers! I will be sharing this in my peer groups this week, it speaks directly to many of their challenges that come up in the first weeks of the cohort. Thank you for sharing this, Sandra.
🥹 really?
That's kind--I'm inspired by YOU.
I think we both need to get that sign, though.
For now, the words are here to stay. Only time will tell for how long that should last.
When it no longer serves me, or anyone, I suppose?
Please. I'm an OG sharer of Elizabeth Edwards essays. Pre-TDB, an honor in itself!
Always here for your Edwords. :)
Thank you!
EDWORDS 🫨
Yes. Yes. Yes!!! Speak it Sandra!! I/We need to hear this declaration over and over as a reminder to stay vigilant against the invisible tyranny of fears that tempt us into silence outside of our awareness. If we're not taking small steps toward our fears we're simply not living. And I agree. Fear is a sign that we're on track and have something worthwhile to say instead of the opposite. This is a large part of why I'm promoting the practice of speaking, and especially personal storytelling, because we run up against the same need to dance with our fears to find the treasure of our expression.
As one of the many people afraid of public speaking, I thank you for fighting the good fight.
"the invisible tyranny of fears that tempt us into silence outside of our awareness."
That's a good line, Rick.
Yes! Next, you and me embrace the open mic 🫣😱😳.
This totally gave me Thomas the engine vibes - from “I think I can” to “Befriend Your Fears!”
Hahaha! To sing? Stand-up? Poetry?
I've always wanted to perform poetry.
That's quite the leap, though! You first.
lol honored to give you Thomas the Engine vibes.
"Because love is my lantern and fear is my shadow. I can’t have one without the other, and maybe I wouldn’t want to."
What a great acknowledgement of the ends of the pendulum we swing to and back from.
✨
"I won’t let fear be the reason I stop sharing what I write and think."
The resolve you put into that line is palpable. I am continually inspired by your words. Thank you.
Thank you!✨
Love the “I choose to feel the fear, not feed it”
Such a great reminder to how we choose to interact with the fear.
Absolutely! That can take awhile to learn though.
lol I LOVE fiction! I plan on sharing some soon :)
"to feed my own fires" ooh I like that.