"When we revel in our uncool, we allow ourselves to be truly seen, and we become mirrors for others to see themselves too." That line will forever stay with me.
What a great testament of an essay for all of us to embrace our uncoolness and in that way build such meaningful "bridges of connection".
Beautifully written, and makes me so happy to call you my friend and have the openness to be uncool with you :)
This essay! Wow! I felt like you were speaking to teenage me. Uncool, scared, and unable to get beyond the shallow. Writing has been me leaning into my uncool, so much that 15 year old Malavika would shudder if she heard I was just slathering it on my Substack so merrily lol for others to see! Thank you for giving us this gem of an essay Sandra. And for bearing witness to your uncool so kindly that you could bear witness to mine so tenderly! 💛
"When we revel in our uncool, we allow ourselves to be truly seen, and we become mirrors for others to see themselves too."
Sometimes I worry our world is entering a friendship recession. Transactional friendships = surface level connections. One's DMs or Messages might be full, but one's heart and soul remains empty. You remind me that we can enrich each other's lives by giving our full self to others.
Brilliant thoughts you shared here, my fellow brilliant friend.
"Friendship recession" is perfect phrasing, by the way. Everything you've said here had me nodding in agreement. There's definitely a disconnect between the inbox and the inner soul.
I think giving our full self to others can be one of the most beautiful things, but I wonder, how do we create the necessary conditions for that?
Reading thoughts like yours reminds me I'm not the only one seeking that depth.
Damn. I would like to bottle this comment and drink it every day. You are 10000% correct. And I'm gonna +1 my previous statement, "Brilliant thoughts you shared here, my fellow brilliant friend." Because this is so brilliantly and profoundly said.
fdikajf;adsikjf;asdjf;alj <-- my brain/insides reading this over a year later
I love the idea of leaning into the uncool depths of our inner truths and finding a place of belonging there, as well as with others who do the same. This essay has me reflecting on all of my relationships. I gotta watch this movie!
"leaning into the uncool depths of our inner truths and finding a place of belonging there, as well as with others who do the same." That's so beautifully said??? 💙
Ah, I love that it's propelled you to reflect--hopefully reflecting in constructive ways!
"When we revel in our uncool, we allow ourselves to be truly seen, and we become mirrors for others to see themselves too." That line will forever stay with me.
What a great testament of an essay for all of us to embrace our uncoolness and in that way build such meaningful "bridges of connection".
Beautifully written, and makes me so happy to call you my friend and have the openness to be uncool with you :)
Is it okay that I'm more than a year late on seeing and responding to this? lol
Your comment made me so happy. Please stay so so uncool.
Glad to have made you asynchronously happy -your [still] uncool friend
"asynchronously happy" lol
ooh yeah, very very uncool -- do you think one day you'll be cool? maybe? 🧐
This essay! Wow! I felt like you were speaking to teenage me. Uncool, scared, and unable to get beyond the shallow. Writing has been me leaning into my uncool, so much that 15 year old Malavika would shudder if she heard I was just slathering it on my Substack so merrily lol for others to see! Thank you for giving us this gem of an essay Sandra. And for bearing witness to your uncool so kindly that you could bear witness to mine so tenderly! 💛
Finally responding to this in honor of 15 year old Malavika who is so cool in her uncoolness. And present-day Malavika too.
:)
Brilliant essay, my brilliant friend 🤘🏽
"When we revel in our uncool, we allow ourselves to be truly seen, and we become mirrors for others to see themselves too."
Sometimes I worry our world is entering a friendship recession. Transactional friendships = surface level connections. One's DMs or Messages might be full, but one's heart and soul remains empty. You remind me that we can enrich each other's lives by giving our full self to others.
Brilliant thoughts you shared here, my fellow brilliant friend.
"Friendship recession" is perfect phrasing, by the way. Everything you've said here had me nodding in agreement. There's definitely a disconnect between the inbox and the inner soul.
I think giving our full self to others can be one of the most beautiful things, but I wonder, how do we create the necessary conditions for that?
Reading thoughts like yours reminds me I'm not the only one seeking that depth.
Perhaps we create the the conditions by giving & receiving without fear or judgement.
Giving ourselves to others takes risk, and risk build trusts. Receiving others means we accept without judgement.
Damn. I would like to bottle this comment and drink it every day. You are 10000% correct. And I'm gonna +1 my previous statement, "Brilliant thoughts you shared here, my fellow brilliant friend." Because this is so brilliantly and profoundly said.
fdikajf;adsikjf;asdjf;alj <-- my brain/insides reading this over a year later
I love the idea of leaning into the uncool depths of our inner truths and finding a place of belonging there, as well as with others who do the same. This essay has me reflecting on all of my relationships. I gotta watch this movie!
"leaning into the uncool depths of our inner truths and finding a place of belonging there, as well as with others who do the same." That's so beautifully said??? 💙
Ah, I love that it's propelled you to reflect--hopefully reflecting in constructive ways!
YES watch please
Sandra, this is 🔥🔥
Great to see you doing some longer essays again!
Thank you for letting me know that, Randy!! I'll take all the fuel I can get to keep going.
Wow, I remember really loving Almost Famous but can’t recall the plot at all now - time for a rewatch! ~your uncool friend
Chao, I love that you've seen it before!! It's such a gem of a movie. I hope everyone watches/rewatches it.
"your uncool friend" made me smile 😌
Also, I appreciate you reading and following along with the Sunday Candy journey!!